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-You Know You're In San Francisco When......
Your co-worker tells you they have eight body piercings - and none are visible. When someone says "tenderloin" - you don't think steak. You think danger. You make well over $100,000 and you still can't find a nice place to live. You think anyone who drives a car to work is decadent. You keep a list of companies to boycott. Your plumber is gay and your barber/beautitian is straight. You would never dream of crossing a picket line. You take the bus and are shocked at two people carrying on a conversation in English. You realize there are far more Rainbow flags in the city than California State Flags. You think anyone wearing a George Clooney haircut is visiting from the Midwest. You can't remember... Is pot still illegal? You go to your office manager's baby shower - the parent's are named Judy and Becky. You give a "thumbs up" gesture to a car with a "Free Tibet" bumper sticker - and you mean it. You have a very strong opinion where your coffee beans are grown, and are willing to fight about it. A really great parking spot can move you to tears. You know that anyone wearing shorts in June is just visiting from Ohio. A man walks on MUNI in full leather regalia and crotch less chaps. You don't notice. You still can't believe a company doesn't offer domestic partner benefits. You curse those damn tourists - but always stop to help a cute guy or gal who is looking puzzled at a city map. When you drive under an underpass - for one moment you think "earthquake". Your boss runs in "The Bay to Breakers"... it's the first time you have seen him nude. Your child's 3rd grade teacher has a nose ring and is named "Breeze". You haven't been to Fisherman's Wharf since the first month you moved to the bay. You are thinking of taking an adult ed class - but you can't decide between a Yoga, Channeling or Building Your Web Site class. You realize the only Republicans you know are your Aunt and Uncle in Texas. When your church elects a new Bishop who abandoned his family and two young daughters to fulfill his sexual urges with another man. |
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