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The Strange Humor of Steve Wright
* Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds? * I have a map of the world at home. Full size, I spent last summer folding it. * Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii? * Why are cigarettes sold in petrol stations when smoking is prohibited there? * If nothing ever sticks to TEFLON, how do they make TEFLON stick to the pan? * Why is abbreviation such a long word?Steve Wright Jokes * How did a fool and his money get together? * Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes? * What's another word for thesaurus? * Why do they call it a TV set when you only get one? * What was the best thing before sliced bread? * Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations? * How does the guy who drives the snowplough get to work in the mornings? * Why is it that when you transport something by car, it's called a shipment, but when you transport something by ship, it's called cargo? * If corn oil comes from corn, where does baby oil come from? * I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize. * I woke up one morning and all of my stuff had been stolen...and replaced by exact duplicates. * Borrow money from pessimists - they don't expect it back. * Half the people you know are below average. * How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink? * My mechanic told me, 'I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder. * Why do psychics have to ask you for your name? * Do you think that when they asked George Washington for his ID that he just whipped out a quarter? * How do I set my laser printer on stun? * If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting? * If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular? * Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them? * If the black box flight recorder is never damaged during a plane crash, why isn't the whole airplane made out of the stuff? * If most car accidents occur within five miles of home, why doesn't everyone just move 10 miles away? * And whose cruel idea was it for the word 'Lisp' to have a 'S' in it? |
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